Thank You

I started thinking. This bear, he lies on the very bed I lay every night for the past 3 years. So, this is for you.

Thank you,

for knowing that I love to read and buying me a book for my birthday... which I threw away.

for thinking of me while you were having fun in Perth on the prefects' trip and getting me a clock... which I threw away.

for knowing I'm a girl and would want jewellery and giving me a necklace... which I returned.

for trying to be romantic and writing a valentine for me... which I tore.

for understanding where I am and trying to be who I want you to be... whom I didn't appreciate.

for thinking of me when you picked out jersey numbers and fighting for the number 5... which is still my favourite.

for being the best boyfriend and getting me a bear with flowers which said "Best Girlfriend"... which is still on my bed.

I'm sorry, I didn't know what love was. You always said you loved me because I was pretty, intelligent and really nice. I was. I liked you because you were charming; you're the lucky guy who had looks, built and charm. But I was luckier. I got you. You chose me. I was happy. Then I knew things would change. So I changed it first, and lost you. I'm sorry. People said you were really sad, but I'm so sorry!

I'm sorry,

for missing your birthday party and made you sad.

for never getting you anything for your birthday.

for acting like I knew everything when I was just afraid.

for giving up on us, just when you started to grow on me.

for leaving without a goodbye.

for pushing you out of my life in every way possible.

I am sorry.

I don't know if I regret, but you probably don't like me now, wherever you are. You still are good-looking. You look older. I wonder what would have happened if we stayed. But I'm better off safe, right?